Poem A Day #14 (Junkie)

Posted: September 17, 2010 in New Poetry, Poetry, September Poem A Day Challenge
Tags: , , , ,

You are

My methamphetamine

You’re my oxycotyn

My fentanyl

My Percocet

My void filler

My pain killer

I cant go to a regular drug dealer

Cuz he doesn’t have you

Every night I try to get a fix

Just watching the things you do

I get high when you walk by and leave your scent on my nose

Withdrawals come

Whenever I see you on the other side of the door as I have to watch it close

Open up my veins

And you’d find very few red cells

But a lot of you cells

I wish there was a supplier who sells

The feeling that you sell

My mind

My body

Your most loyal customers

Its an understatement to say that I fein and lust for her

Sit back and watch my bank account go bust because of her

Sell everything I had and live in a brown paper bag just for her

Watch me do my dance

Gimme some change

I gotta have her

For her ill endure the pain and ignore your laughter

Street sweeping the streets that I sleep in but never sleepin

Always lookin for a new hustle

Devotion and addiction

It’s a thin line once you listen to the internal struggle

I mumble

Those three words as if that’s suppose to explain it all

Never digesting the reality im fed that

You never helped with the pain at all

Didn’t want to see it myself so someone else had to

That

All this pain was nonexistent before I had you

I thought I had to

Have you in my life to get through the night and make it all right

But truthfully

I woulda made it all right

I thought you were my light

But in reality you were just a lighter section in my same dark night

And now it’s a fight

A struggle for my sanity

And to rediscover the good man in me

Cuz right now hes taking a sabbatical

And the me that you see is something a bit more radical

A bit more DON’T PUSH ME

A bit more CLOSE EDGE

A bit less afraid to go standin netless over next to the ledge

A little bit less passive

And a lotta bit more reckless

And much more likely to

‘Oh you wanna test me, well WATCH THIS’

Less of what God made me

And more of what I changed into because of you

Placing blame it mostly goes to that man in the mirror

but without you im starting to see and understand him a little clearer

and you too

you’re my bad habit

my former addiction

once upon a time you were

my constant affliction

once a junkie

now recovering

once a broken man

now putting the pieces back together

once a fool

now realizing

for my health

we just cant be together

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Comments
  1. aseel says:

    The poem was a story of love and the heart break that follows, then an abrupt end to the story. The ending came quicker than I thought but the rest of the poem was great and had good flow. Nice job T

    • nikayla says:

      *snaps*
      I really like this one because its more like a story, and once it got to a certain point I thought it was going to end but then it just changed up and became a whole new chapter.
      LOVE IT !! .. keep up the great work hun

  2. David Jones says:

    Great rhythm and flow to this one…I enjoyed reading it.

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